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segunda-feira, 31 de maio de 2010

Pain Of Love: Chapter Three @ 14:28

...He opened the door and Tom entered.
-Hey Deja.
-Tom.
-Can we talk?
-Yes.
I smilled and he sitted in my bed.
- Tell me.
I looked at him and he gave me a serious look.
- De... What happened last night...
- Tom... I don't whant to talk abou that...
- Please. I just whant to know this.
Silence.
- It wasnt the first time he hitted you, was it?
- Tom. It had never happened before. It was the first time, and he was ... he was drunk, nothing more.
I was lieing. It wasn't the first time Matt hitted me. Everytime when we got back from tour, and come to Germany, we have discussions wich always ended in him hitting me. I don't whant anyone to know... by know it's better.
- You don't know how to lie.
- I'm not lyeing!
- Yes you are!
He stood up and started to walk around the room.
- I'm not!
- De I know you! Everytime we are on tour you are happy, excited and you always go out with us, but when we are here, when we arrive, you're happy, you're the Deja I Know, but after that, after you being with that fucker, you are sad, depressed, tired and sometimes you come hurt, or you think that we don't see it?! We almost live in the same hotel room!
- Tha-that... That is nothing! Nothing is happening! Now please get out I have a date with Matt.
I got up and he gently grabbed my arms.
- Why?
- He sent me a message telling me sorry and to meet him at the beach.
- Are you going to forgive him?
I looked into his eyes.
- I - I... Don't know.
I hugged him, and he got out of the room.

At the beach

- Deja!
-Hey.
-Im so sorry babe! Please forgive me, I love you! And I know you love me back, please forgive me!
-Matt I don't know if I will.
-Please! I love you, yesterday what happened was all a mistake!
I started to think in what Tom said, and in all those days when I got back hurt, sad and broken hearted.
-Matt the problem is that it wasn't just yesterday...- I was a bit frightened with how would he react - It's always. When I'm here or when I'm with you, you always end hurting me.
We were sitted in the sand near the watter. I was grabbing my legs and looking to the ocean while talking.
-I don't mean to do that babe, I would never hurt you.
After Matt say this I took a pause to again think if it was worth all what I was suffering.
We spent more or less than 30 minutes without talking.
-No.
-Was babe?
-I think it's better to end, it's not working anymore...
I looked at him, he was looking to te sea.
-You don't love me anymore?
-I don't... I don't think so Matt. And even if I loved you, I wouldnt be with you. You hurt me to much.
-You don't whant to stay with me maybe because you love somebod else, better maybe you're dating someone else.
-What?
-You know who I'm talking about.
-For the love of gott.
-Admit it.
-Bye Matt.
I got up and started walking away from him.
He stood up and yelled:
-Come back here, we didn't finish talking!
-Yes we did! - I yelled back while walking back.
I looked back, he was angry, very angry like when he was about to hit me.
-You're not getting the fuck away before explaining me why you whant to end.- I listened him saying to him self.
He started to run towards me, afraid of what he was going to do I started to run, but he was to fast and h grabbed me and layed me on the sand. He sitted on me.
-What have I done wrong for you to leave me!
-GET OUT!
-NEINE!
He hitted me.
-Answer why!
I tried to get to my phone with one hand, but I couldnt fint it.
- LEt me go Matt! Please!
- I'm not letting you go!
He hitted me some more times, I couldnt defend my self from him.
- Do you like me now babe?!
I don't know how, but I manage to kick him in hi balls, he leaned to the sand, so I got up and started to run away.
- Come here bitch!
This was the last thing I heard from him.
I walked 'till the hotel where me and the guys were staying.
I thought about what happened in that afternoon, last night, what Tom said to me... I thought about it all.
In the road many people were looking at me with a strange face, I didn't knew what was going on so I got into a little caffe, went to the bathroom and looked to my self in the mirror.
I was with some bruisings in my arms and face. Mainly in my arms.
I didn't care about it, and I totally forgot to hide it from Tom.
Hotel
I was entering the elevator and clicked the floor where I was going, but instead of going up, it went down.
The door opened.
- De what happened?!

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I woke up and started to think about everything that happened last night. My thoughs were interrupted by Bill walking into my room.
I got out of the bed and went towards him. I gave him a hug.
-Hallo.
-Hi.
-So ... Deja what happened last night?
I didn't answered, I started to look for my cellphone.
-Tom don't whant to tell me... And you to.
Silence
-You can trust me De... What are you looking for?
-Hum...? Oh... ah... my phone I don't know where it is.
-Is this your phone?- I looked at Bill and take the phone out of his hand.
-How...?Where was it?
-You lefted it in the bar last night.
I went to the batroom and started to wash my teeth.
-You're not going to tell me right?
I nodded
-I'm gonna make you!
-Oh really? How?
-Like this.
Bill started to tickel (?) me. I couldn't stop laughing. I started running to my bed, there he layed me down and started to tickle me again.
-I TELL I TELL!!!
-Ok tell me.
He stopped tickling me and sitted in the bed in front of me.
-So I was at the bar with Matt, when you and the guys came in, he started to asking me none sense things and then I slapped him and got out of the bar.
-But when you got out Tom went behind you too...
-Outside I was walking away from him, when he pushes me and slapes me, Tom came and punched him...After that we came here, to the hotel.
-You...
Bill's phone started to ring.
-Ja?...Ok.
I looked at him.
-I need to go, but when I come back I whant to know promenors... Are you staying here?
I looked at my phone, it was a Matt's message.
"Sorry for last night, please, come and meet me on the beach"
-Not any more. - I smiled.
-Bye De.
He opened the door and Tom entered.
-Hey Deja.
-Tom.
-Can we talk?
-Yes.
I smilled and he sitted in my bed.

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domingo, 30 de maio de 2010

Pain Of Love: Chapter One @ 16:06

I know Tom and Bill since when we were babys. We are bestfriends, I can tell them anything and they can do the same with me.
Now we are 20 years old, and still BFF's. Since 2003, they have a band called Tokio Hotel, I'm not in it but I'm always on tour with them, and that makes Matt(my boyfriend) really angry.
Tokio Hotel includes Gustav and Georg, we met them when Tom and Bill where in a caffe singing.
I was in my hotel room, when someone knocked.
-Yes?
-Deja?- It was Tom.
-Hey Tom.
I put my computer near me and sitted in my bed.
-Hey! You wanna come with us?
-Where?
-Have a drink in a bar near the beach.
-Sorry I have already things to do
-With who?
-With Matt, of course.- I got up and started to search for some clothes.
-You're steel dating with that guy?
-Yes.
-De, he is insane, mad,crazy. You shouldnt be with him.
-Why are you saying that?
-Because ...
-Hi Deja!! - Bill entered in the room all happy.(lool)
-Bill-I hugged him.
-So are you prepared for your date?
-How did you know - me and Tom asked.
-I know everything- he blinked.
In the bar
-Deja!
-Matt!
I kissed him and we got into the bar. We started talking, until Bill, Tom, Gus and Ge walked into the bar and Tom gave an angry look to Matt.
-What happened?- I asked when I saw Matt's face.
-Nothing babe, so how is your friend?
-My friend?
-Yes, Tom.
-Why are you asking?
-Well, he entered right now in this bar and he looked to us like he dint like the idea of me and you being together.
-So...?
-Deja are you and Tom lovers?
*WTF look*
-No! Neine!
-Tell me the truth!
-WTF Matt, your exagerating!
-Oh really? I see how he looks at you and you spent many time with him on tour!
-Matt stop right now!
-Oh you whant to stop the conversation because you don't whant to admit that you're having sex with Tom.
After this I slapped (? not sure if this is the right way to spell it :P) him, I stood up and saw the boys looking at us. I got out of the bar and Matt came after me, he grabbed my arm and turned me around.
-Don't ever slap me.
-Matt you're hurting me.
Tom came after us.
-Matt let me go!
After this Matt, with the other hand, slapped me, and this made me fall in the ground. Tom was behind him.
-What the fuck are you doing?! - He pushed Matt
-Oh look who's here the little rapper!
-Shut up!
-And if I dont shut up? Are you going to cry to your gay brother's shoulder?!Ah!
Tom punched Matt wich made him fall.
-Don't fuck around with me Matt.
Tom helped me to get up, and we called the guys.
During the "trip" to the hotel we didn't talk, but I knew that Tom looked at me from time to time.

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